Write now...

I'm up at 7am to write. Yesterday I discovered Jeff Goins' "You ARE a Writer, So Start Acting Like One", in Amazon kindle's free list. Within 5 pages I was already feeling the nudge; page 8 brought the prod; page 15 the desire and by page 30 I was inspired to make a commitment to this thing that has hovered around me for decades... writing.


I especially resonated with the words he wrote in the section, 


Cancel Contingencies. 


"There’s a trend amongst writers. Most have more ideas than they know what to do with. They have hundreds of half-written articles and a few books started. How many of these projects have they finished? None. I was the same way. Once a month on a Saturday, when the wind was blowing just right and I felt inspired, I would write. I’d write for hours at a time — long, drawn-out essays about who-knows-what. It felt beautiful and precious, but really it was a waste of energy. I would come up with imaginative ideas and potential projects —websites and communities and other brilliant creations. Some of them I’d actually start, even followed through with a few. But I finished exactly none." 
Goins, Jeff (2012-04-27). You Are a Writer (So Start Acting Like One) (Kindle Locations 258-261). Jeff Goins. Kindle Edition. 


Wow, this guy is speaking my language! With any luck, I thought, as I started to flip-the-screen (as opposed to turn-the-page), he's going to give me a quick and easy remedy for this problem. Oh yeah, he was going to give me a remedy alright, a smack of reality right up-side my excuse-filled head...


Fear


"Fear of finishing. Fear of picking one thing and sticking with it. We think, what if it’s the wrong thing? What if I mess it up? Here’s the truth: There is no wrong thing. Just begin. Once you learn how to finish, you’ll be able to start again. Cancel all backup plans, pick a project (it may be a book, blog or whatever) and move forward. Start writing. If you don’t, all you’re doing is waiting."


It's not even like I hadn't heard this type of information/advice before. It sounds kind of familiar, but apparently the previous presentations just didn't stick. This one did, and here I am at 7:25 a.m., out of bed to be a writer... write now.


My writing has been published and produced. It's not like I don't have a small, but impressive (to me, at least), writing history. All of those accomplishments were during a time when I had a lot to say about a lot of things. I was a new lesbian, a full-time mom earning part-time wages, an ex-Mormon seeing the world I'd been raised in from a completely new perspective and a too-early-menopausal woman (37). I didn't need any help working myself into a tizzy about a multitude of issues. Yet, as I wandered further down the lane-o-life, I began to see that there was just nothing important enough to get that riled-up about.


Truth is, I'm more in a live-and-let-live place than I've ever been before. With that softening of opinions came the feeling that I didn't really need to write anymore. Writers must have convictions! (right?) Writers must have something important to impart! (right?) Writers must have a need to put their perspective out there for a reason! (right?)


Well, maybe. And maybe not...


...because I am a writer. I've known it for a long time. And write now, I'm just going to start and see where it leads me.


It might be boring; it might be full of queen-of-run-on-sentences jargon; it might be dangerously personal; it might be delightfully engaging; it might have questionable content; it might piss some people off; it might bring ridicule and rejection right to my doorstep; it might ignite my true passion; it might ignite yours; it might be too much; it might be just right; it might accidentally inspire someone... it might be okay after all.


This is my first blog post in nearly 3 years. My new goal is to write every day, pick the best of the week and update this page every Sunday. I'm putting it out there with intention, feel free to hold me to it.


This entry is on Monday, because, with writing, it's important to Just Begin.